I heard it is quite rough there … fights breaking out a lot, etc.. No partying, I was travelling with my parents. I wanted to say that there are 5 guys to one woman here, so anyone who speaks of personality and being cool is full of crap. I always love reading that someone will pray for me, I find that so touching. Good story but I thought the ending would have been happier for ya!. It will be in the mean time you are a happy person so that the hell live and let live!. Nooooo it is a happy ending in many ways. There was a typo in my earlier comment.
She was jealous, she could not be the woman sitting next to this power guy. Most of them have henpecked boring husbands at home. Most Indian woman are not racist, but yearn to the that fair lovely blonde. Part of it is also the general attitude of women and men towards women and the West in this society. I can say this because the other day I heard a relative of mine take a dig at the West and women in particular, saying that well! The reason she blurted this out was we were watching TV and caught glimpses of women in cute little skirts.
I thought they were cute but she had to offload her negativity. According to her, she did the right thing by getting married at 20 and having children while I am 34 and refusing to settle down as of yet. Deep down I do think she wants to be like me I am very liberal and independent but she did not have the chance to do so because of societal constraints.
So she gets over it by taking digs at me and the west sometimes. If she truly accepts what is, maybe her house of cards comes tumbling down. All we can do is bless their small minds even though it can hurt at times. I fell in love with Indian men on my first trip to Indian. In US I am surrounded by them and never once even took a second look until after coming back to the US.
It is really hard for me not to go gaga after them. My first experience was on Diwali. I was dressed in Sari and on an open terrace in office. One of my colleagues was very, very good looking, as most Indian men I have had the pleasure of knowing are. He was also dressed up. We were watching the fireworks all over the city when he started to sing. Such a lovely voice, fireworks…. Nothing ever came of that except that moment, but that was all it took for me.
Since then I have had several Indian loves! I even married one!!! I did also experience this same racist behavior and evil looks there while I was in Indian. The majority of my friends are men and excuse me if I am friendly! The only thing I could really compare it to is how some black women in the US many of which are friends of mine would get so upset that their black brother was dating a white woman. I am happy to say that my inlaws are thrilled with our relationship.
Some of the villagers may not be so much, but that is only perhaps because it becomes reality for them that this lone villager came to America and became successful and if he had married one of their daughters they would also be successful. Glad you got to experience the dating scene in India and also glad you are not letting this one situation deter you.
The fireworks story is sweet, one moment that stays with you is sweet. Best of luck with your marriage and kudos on winning over the in-laws! Such men are not worthy of you or any woman for that matter simply for the fact that they have no respect for women. Its not the color that matters, it takes a real man and true love above all to beat every obstacle and accept you the way your are… And for the Indian woman who ruined your evening would have had her own reasons for doing so… not that she would have known you as a divorcee with a kid or not even because you are a foreigner, but maybe simply because she knew the guy on date with you… possible Well, if your quest for finding the RIGHT MAN continues, I wish you good luck… Cheers!!!
Thanks for taking the time to comment and for your concern. I hope you dont meet such people who pass such unacceptable comments. That was totally uncalled for. As an Indian married to a white woman for a decade, I could certainly relate to your story. We are from the liberal eastern seaboard part of the country.
I am sure our experience would have been much more delightful down in the enlightened south. Not one of them has the cojones to say that to our face, of course. My wife is mostly oblivious to all that or does not seem to care all that much but it sure does sour my mood to the extent of avoiding such small-minded, nasty, negative-vibes emitting groups in public.
It feels so sad that you will be judged automatically without even them knowing you as a person but just because of your race. I admire the respect they gave to their moms and what the rest of their relatives has to say but its just sad its so rare a man has successfully stand up and speak what his heart beats for when it comes to love.
All marriages always have been either a bloody start or a man completely disown by his family. There is no amount of pain I can describe losing my Indian love but it has come to a conclusion that I do not matter much than what his mother or family has to say and now he has to end up in an arranged marriage.
My situation is even less complex and I also have conservative values like they do but still it has not validate anything to make them consider me to be a part of their family. Its a complete no, we do not want to talk about her and you should have an Indian wife. It sucks because it is rude, ignorant and racist. As for my perception, I was kind of stuck there and had unnecessary fears of the new and unknown.
Some fears were of people of cultures I had never been in the presence of before. It was a long process. Now, I am still learning and constantly studying a new language and culture, including Telegu and Hindi. I speak several languages. I also live in a diverse metropolitan area with large exposure to many cultures. I enjoy this experience exceedingly and often. For example, one of my sisters cannot stand hearing spanish spoken.
So much a difference and freedom in getting out of a small frame of mind and aspect. It really does often start with fear of unknown. I think a lot of people have mentioned it here, but Indian guys in the west actually have it a lot worse than your situation.
Not only is there the occasional social ostracism, but most western white women are incredibly racist against Indian men. Just imagine most of the opposite sex considering you smelly, dirty and undesirable. Ignorant people are everywhere indeed! Thanks for taking the time to comment and your sweet message. I have noticed in America, people who are racist against Indians, Arabs or whatever hide behind smiles.
In India people will openly say how they feel. Both are bad, but honestly I prefer the Indian way! And all I can say about the old lady in the restaurant is, just feel sorry for her. Imagine how terrible a life she must be having if it makes her feel good to pass judgement on other people? Lastly, I am hopeful there are at least 2 more great Indian power guys out there for us and will keep my eyes open for us both! I am just amazed by your experiences in Bangalore.
I am your favorite fan and have posted in different incarnations in your delectably seductive blog. I am your ardent admirer. I am speaking from experience having taken my ex-wife and current girlfriend to India , both white westerners. I live in California. Oh, that wicked witch of a judgemental older Indian woman? Living here in the US , I have dated the rainbow coalition , mostly white women was married to a white american woman but also women of other colors.
Currently, I am engaged to a white american woman again took her to India and being a pale-skinned, blonde-haired, blue-eyed woman either got treated in extremes , either like a celebrity unlike the boring Indian guy next to her moi! My girlfriend ironically is a socially conservative, meditating, yoga type more into Hinduism than me and more into India than me even though she is a westerner!
India is as prejudiced as any other country and is based on ignorance, lack of exposure and the older generation especially those who experienced British India can be prejudiced towards whites! I am sorry you had to experience this awful scenario but hopefully, your experiences have been wonderful! Thanks for your sweet reply. I am glad you appreciated my wacky humor especially about wacky, bigoted, narrow-minded, gossipy, washed out Indian auntie types! When I got my divorce from my american ex-wife, I realized quickly that I am stuck with dating western women.
When a progressive, liberal, educated, post-modern, Europeanized Indian man like me attempts to date an Indian woman, divorced or never married, he is inevitably dragged into primitive, medieval, 19th century, maybe even 18th century Indian cultural baggage. Groan, a No-No-No for me! Not even one of the several western many american women I have dated ever considered me to be a lesser human for being divorced. Like-wise , their divorced status , with or without kids was immaterial to me. Most of my Indian male friends, divorced from their Indian wives have inevitably hitched up married with american or other western women and likewise with divorced Indian women albeit to a lesser extent.
It is almost impossible to meet at the far end of the west or the far end of the east but you meet at the cross-roads. The sunsets are better at the cross-roads. Ironically, my current american gf, my fiancee finds me more desirable that I am divorced, have the life experiences and I find her to be more desirable that she too has a similar past, albeit she is a bit younger. Plus the fact that she is madly in love with Indian culture more so than I am into Indian culture allows us to meet at the East-West cross-roads where the sunsets are better!
I like my wine, beer, European art, European films and elegant European meals. She likes her version of Indian culture, Indian art, Indian music and an Indian guy to share it with to boot!! So, I look forward to reading and absorbing your intellectual and cultural depth and of course, your dazzling , enchanting beauty! I have always found Vanilla and Cappuccino mix my skin color to be tastier than just plain vanilla or just plain Cappuccino! In , this hilarious French comedy about a tall blonde french detective was an incredibly successful film,. Holy cow, you need to start a blog hahaha Daaaang that was long.
Women are believed to be goddess of house who brings luck, knowledge, etc etc but it is also true that many early settlers in west were the ones who married white women today their generations are every where. Hey Angela , I came across your blog today and fond it very Interesting. Its not just about dating white girls,they would have issues even if the guy is dating an Indian girl who spoke a different language. You should read this book called two states by Chetan bhagat.. But yeah one more thing ,not everyone is like that, my sister has an American boyfriend and will be marrying him next month.
She was just jealous and envious of you. So chill and have fun…;. Please let me add my two cents here… I am a white American woman who is married to a gorgeous Indian man who was born in India. We are both professionals. We have a lovely young son. Also, he is a few years younger than I am. It was a bit difficult for his parents at first but they are wonderful people who now love and accept me and our marriage. Yes, Indian women do stare at me when we go out. I have just gotten used to this as a cultural thing. Also, because I am different- blonde hair, blue eyes, and very fair skin.
My Desi man is sexy, smart, loving, and a wonderful husband and father who does his fare share of child rearing and housekeeping. What could be better? Hamraj is my name, my mother is forcing me to marry a Indian girl, I want to marry a white woman. I love the radiance of white women, it invigorating! I came across your blog as I am a white woman in Texas who has dated multiple Indian men. Whilst one was Catholic I am too he told me that his mother would not approve because I was not Indian. My current boyfriend is Hindu and we have not had this conversation yet, but it scares me.
Perhaps I should start dating back within my own ethnicity so this hurt does not keep happening? Best of luck to you! I wanted to make a comment. Firstly, white woman are pretty, but ignorant and reserved here for the most. They tend to prefer their own clan.
By the way I have the best personality, well groomed and have an excellent figure and wheatish face. It just redneck here. So in my case what Ajay Texas said does not apply. I really loved reading your post and I have so much to comment on your review on dating indian men but I want to keep it short. It is very unique and rare in white girl to have a taste for Indian men. They are not only good looking but well educated and highly attired women.
The another thing I also wanted to say that indian women are generally very conservative, sometimes in good ways and also bad ways. The woman who laughed at you is probably not even literate. So, there is nothing to worry at all, you will find these people every day in life and is also disappointing that experiencing this event in really top class restaurant like samarkhand, is very unlikely and should not happened. However, there a thousands of people in bangalore who have all the money to buy designer wear bags and not even able to pronounce the brand correctly.
Reflections from a White Woman on Dating An Indian Man | Angela's Bangalore
I really dont like to talk about it. However, they will surely accept a blonde girl as there daughter in law, if I feel she is the one for me. I am pretty sure that if my child is ready to marry ethnically different person, I will agree on it. I hope you find a amazing husband. If you make Indian parents fall in love with you, the marriage is literally done. Your comment made giggle, thanks for that! I will probably never see that particular Indian man again but I will always cherish that time and the experiences I had with him around Bangalore.
By the way, I went to UCI for about a year, lived in Newport Beach on 39th Street at that time…had a white Jeep Wrangler and used to roller blade on the boardwalk every night. I have very happy memories from that time. I lived in El Segundo for 1 yr and had a business in Dwtn L. A on 7th and Grand. I have not been to Bangalore since 94, but reside in Mumbai when I go to India. The best part about me is I can date or marry a white girl and there are no restrictions.
Do’s for Foreigners Dating in India
How easy can it get. You are forgetting that generation that was talking bad about you, came from being on the cusp of being disrespected, raped, and otherwise mistreated by the british. There were whole streets in Calcutta where indians were not allowed and a lot of that anger and hatred carries forward. Nothing new about that, in the US we routinely get asked the same stupid and equivalent dumb questions whenever something bad in Pakistan, the middle east, or any non-white country occurs.
You look like a wonderful person, enjoy your time. The divorce and kid thing also has nothing to do with you, if you were Indian and the same thing you would have the same issues, and it is not that you are divorced it is that they believe you have a pattern for leaving your husband so you will repeat. Hello, Great to hear about your experiences with Indian men and wish you the best. I love my wife dearly and we have a wonderful relationship.
I have dated women of other races in the past. A lot of it has to do with their attitudes and lack of understanding and integrating with life in America. Like many traditional indian men, they base their understanding of American on movies or books rather than real life or approach American women like they were Indian and come across as pushy and domineering here. I mention this in response to some of the posts citing racism in America. If they were to approach an American woman on the same cultural playing field as an American man, since they are in America, it would work. I am not dominant or pushy and just ask to go for coffee and they refuse outright.
I have lived here all my life, so no excuses that I am Indian etc…. I play sports and am not intimidated by any white guy or girl, so integration is not an issue. Yes it is racism here period. I told you it has just started to change, but you hardly see mixed couples here. I rest my case. I think its better to marry in the same culture you brought up because it adds less complication to relationship. I am not saying not to date anyone beyond your culture if you knew you can handle it with dignity and trust.
My parents came from India but i grew up in Asia pacific in an eastern European neighbor hood community. Infact you can say i grew up with them their culture their tradition makes me feel home. And the ladies i dated are all from Eastern European none from India. Because i knew there is big difference in culture and i may not able to handle stress that comes with it. I married my Romanian sweet heart and we have 6 year old daughter from this marriage.
If you ask me if we had problem sure like every couple but never had cultural problem coz i understood her culture very well. If you are uncertain of different culture then its better you stick to your own. It saves your time from divorce. Well good luck with that. You will find love when you least expect it. And to date someone of different culture you have to understand their culture. No one would date a guy or girl who is complete alien to their culture and why would they.
I am telling you from my personal experience. Best Wishes from New Zealand. Ok nothing about culture race and religion I think. Maybe growing up in Texas has to do with this? Try to be cool,be yourself. Work on personal growth first. Do not complain about it in front of her rather talk something else like how you talk to your friends. Make her comfortable around you,take her to dates that involved many activities like visiting museums,walk around in the city,show her what your made off. Take her to an art or pottery class,be spontaneous.
Do not bring her to a movie. I am not sure if you are referring to me. I'll let you be the judge of that A good friend of mine is exactly the person you're describing as an ideal Indian man at least, in terms of looks, but he is pretty smart too. Angular jawline, good-looking face, and good sense of style. When we're lifting together, I always joke that he should just give up on powerlifting and become a bodybuilder instead, since he already has the wasp-like taper old-school bodybuilders coveted lmao. Yeah, this is why I have NO sympathy for indian guys blaming their race for their lack of dates.
Unsurprisingly, once I did those things those problems went away. Clearly, I had either turned white somewhere along the line It's worth adding that yes, I'm not oblivious - race does have an effect on these things. It's essentially an unattractiveness multiplier. That is to say, if you possess an unattractive quality - being indian makes you lose more points for it than a white guy would. The ones that complain have already made some effort. Dont use the word pajeet you muppet So you're an Indian guy that calls other Indian people "pajeet"? I agree with your point but adopting 4chan epithets towards Indians and using it yourself isn't too bright.
He obviously is just a white guy pretending to be brown so he can further his white power agenda. I think the issue is grooming and confidence. We do see fat ugly asian dudes with hot asian girls. I was a fat dude with hot girls. And over the last 7 years and weightloss did i get 'fit and handsome'. Eh, that's not entirely true. The fat ugly asian dudes with hot asian girls are usually dating FOBs, and objectively standards for guys in asian countries are lower than in the west this is part of the reason why so many guys don't bother with trying to look good - back home they wouldn't really have a hard time being the way they are.
Confidence is icing on the cake. Are there some cases where confident but unattractive guys can bag hot girls? Sure, but chances are if your confidence isn't there yet, it's a hell of a lot easier to just work on your appearance lol, especially getting big. The dating game becomes progressively easier the better looking you get, and the difference is exponential. Confidence is also much easier to obtain when you look good. Lets not sugarcoat the truth, American contemporary society is very looks focused whether we like it or not.
As Asian men, you should feel a sense of duty to represent Asian Americans. Couldn't agree more man. Unlike other minorities mainly blacks , we don't have TV and movies to make us look cool It's a tough job but someone's gotta do it. I'm on the shorter side and keep to myself and I've still been with all types of girls including that whole blonde sorority girl archetype. They don't deserve to be happy if they can't put in the effort. How short are we talking about? Cause 5'8 and shit is Tinder short but ain't a problem IRL. You're taller than most women and women are terrible at judging height IRL, so with a in bump on Tinder, you're golden.
I have a problem with calling these qualities a proprietary white thing. You could have all the characteristics and still be who you are. Otherwise I agree with everything said. Where did I do that? I'm highlighting that my problems went away, and it wasn't because of race i. You couldn't be more wrong.
I'm half middle eastern but was born in the US, so I'm completely American. My dad never even taught me his culture, so I don't know anything about it. I have a great job, own my house and car, workout every day, eat healthy, great shape, lots of hobbies, socialize, etc, etc, yet I can't get a date for the life of me. It most certainly comes down to race. Let me tell you, fitness is pretty much universally attractive. Fitness and grooming transcend race. Having a nice personality is even better.
I can see where you are going with this. At the time I thought he was black. Turns out he is Indian, born and raised in England. Too bad he never made it big.
Dating in India: The Do’s and Don’ts as a Foreign Woman
I remember a couple of hits and he disappeared. Last I heard he got married and had one or two kids. I could have sworn Shahrukh Khan was quite a big thing, maybe just in Australia? I used to sit up watching his movies on SBS and I had a massive crush on him. They inherently think of Indians that they are stinky, hairy cheap charlies that will bring them back to their cheap hotel where the rest of their gang will wait for the one sent out with money in his pockets to bring a female to share with the rest. Idk I find it pretty easy and am brown with messy hair and beard.
I'm also like 6'2". Idk they tend to like me a lot. I'm 6'3, and in great shape, workout every day and eat healthy. Also have a great job, my own house, car, etc, etc, but can't get a date for the life of me. I'm really autistic tho so they don't end up liking me but they'd prolly be inclined to fucking me if not. Indians are very different from the rest of East Asians physically we look very different and also culturally.
I've heard that in the UK East indian men do better. I also live in Vancouver and Indian dudes are seen as pretty athletic and cool around here.
The answer is yes Due to the alt-left mainstream media so focused on preventing backlash from terrorism The alt-left focuses on lifting up black, brown, women, gay, bi, cross dressing trannies, etc Sorry, but you are wrong. It most certainly is about being white. I'm half middle eastern, but I workout every day, eat healthy, I'm in great shape, have all those great qualities that you listed above and yet, because I'm brown, I still can't get a date for the life of me.
Never had an issue with any girl of any race. Give a girl space, play it cool. Get some good Tinder pics. Yup, even a caveman in Thailand can do it. Workout everyday, eat healthy, good job, house, car, social, etc, etc. Can't get a date for the life of me. Funny you say that. Although I am American, I am half middle eastern. That's where the problem really resides. American women don't like dating brown guys.
Yeah, you should consider yourself lucky that you aren't hit with the small penis stereotype that much, even though Indians, more so than other Asians, do on average have smaller dicks: