Best first message on dating site

The word pretty is a perfect case study for our point. But very pretty is almost always used to describe the way something or someone looks, and you can see how that works out.

There’s more to it than you think

We took a close look at salutations. The more informal standard greetings: There are many words on the effective end of our list like zombie , band , tattoo , literature , studying , vegetarian yes! Talking about specific things that interest you or that you might have in common with someone is a time-honored way to make a connection, and we have proof here that it works.


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Awkward , sorry , apologize , kinda , and probably all made male messages more successful, yet none of them except sorry affects female messages. A lot of real-world dating advice tells men to be more confident, but apparently hemming and hawing a little works well online.

First Message Online Dating Formula That Works (With Examples)

It could be that appearing unsure makes the writer seem more vulnerable and less threatening. It could be that women like guys who write mumbly. Mentioning your religion helps you, but, paradoxically, it helps you most if you have no religion. These are the religious terms that appeared a statistically significant number of times.

Atheist actually showed up surprisingly often times per 10, messages, second only to mentions of christian and ahead of for jewish and for muslim.

2. Create an intriguing opening line

But ideally you should just disbelieve the whole thing. Tailor it to their interests or their work, or even one of their photos.

5 best dating app opening lines- Love Bites with Emily Hartridge

A good first message is sweet, and short. One hundred words is about right: Just aim to get a conversation going.

Exactly What To Say In A First Message – The OkCupid Blog

As they say in showbiz, leave them wanting more. Similarly, if you claim to love your job but the time stamp on your message says you sent it at 9. Stick to neutral hours, like lunchtimes and early evening. Ideally, write it before you leave the house to do something interesting.


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  • Have fun writing your messages, and enjoy the process of meeting someone new. For more helpful tips head over to our advice pages or blog! This is the perfect time of year to get serious about your quest for love.

    15 opening lines that will get a response on your dating apps

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