All the students come from poorer rural areas. They work in restaurants or in construction. A person's social status in China is determined by the authorities. The so-called Hukou system of household registration, splits all people into two categories: The place where a Chinese person is registered determines their access to doctors, schools - and also to urban, middle-class women. No date takes place in China without someone politely asking about the other person's Hukou status. Someone who moves to the city can, with some luck, attain the same privileges as the people who were born there.
A yearslong rural Hukou, however, is like a scarlet letter. At the flirt school, the men are taught how to compensate for their origins through charm. The syllabus for the course also includes a "one-on-one critique of chatting. But every time he would like to make a move, she leaves the chat. Liu connects Liu's mobile phone to a projector, which he uses to read Liu's chronology of failure out loud. Sometimes Liu starts a conversation about their company in the middle of the night.
Then he wants to play "truth or dare. Love shakes his head. He takes the mobile phone and chats, pretending to be Liu. After 20 minutes of small talk, it gets serious. Late in the evening, when the course has ended, Liu steps out into the night.
His mind is running in circles. How could he forget how a woman once described him as a "triple zero" and said that a relationship with him would only result in a "naked wedding" -- no celebration, no ring, no financial gifts, no car, no honeymoon.
Of course, who would even want that in a China where there are wedding studios everywhere in which you can pose in front of islands, skyscrapers or a home you have allegedly purchased? The next day, Liu calls his colleague from the chat. Suddenly, she doesn't have any time after all.
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The Chinese government long ago recognized that the hordes of frustrated men migrating to the cities are a problem. What is to be done with the prospectless, aging, single men from the country? The party now wants more children and is organizing mass group dates across the country that are attracting hundreds of people. It is launching online dating sites and holding romantic game nights in areas where loneliness is particularly prevalent. Managers at state-owned companies have even taken to arranging dates for their employees without being asked.
It is difficult for women to resist this push for marriage, especially those who aspire to being more than just a wife. She's at a marriage market in Shanghai where frustrated parents offer up their single children. Hui is 29, very beautiful, an economist.
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She has studied in London and the United States, and she now jets between Europe and China in the employ of a large company. And yet her chances of finding a husband are, despite the excessive numbers of men, bad. From a Chinese perspective, she is too career-oriented for a woman. Since dawn, about mothers and fathers have been fighting for the best spots to place their open umbrellas, to which they have pinned their children's resumes. A female doctor is looking for a partner. A designer wants to get married. A banker is looking for love.
Every resume is like a top-level application.
Almost all parents are touting daughters in their late twenties. They call these women " Sheng nu " in China, leftover women. Chinese parents often invest a large part of their money in raising their only child, pampering him or her like a prince or a princess.
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They're only happy once their project is crowned with the arrival of the perfect spouse. Hui says her visit to the wedding market is mostly meant to calm her parents. Many parents have been coming with their umbrellas for years, without any success. It makes them feel better to confront their children's fate together. The state-run women's organization All-China Women's Federation has defined "leftover women" as those who remain unmarried and are over the age of In its official view, women need to "fight" starting at the age of 25, and women between the ages of 31 and 35 are considered "high-ranking leftover women.
Hui's father pushes his daughter to the unremarkable corner where sons are being presented. A doctor gets the family's attention. The father finds his basic parameters acceptable. Hui's mother dreamily looks at the umbrellas. Three days later, when the marriage market has ended and Hui is once again sitting in her office, she calls the journalist. Now that her parents aren't listening, she would like to correct something.
Unlike Liu from the flirting class or Mr. Rich from the elite agency, she believes that feelings are more important than status. After decades of the one-child policy, she says, as a woman, she can choose. Hui hasn't told her mother yet, but she's dating a colleague. A polite man who treats her well, but he isn't a high achiever. Her family, she argues, needs to approve her selection.
She says she went to the movies with him over the weekend. What I don't understand is even with all this romance in the air there is still an unbelievable divorce rate of about couples a day in China! Is the problem therefore in the courting process? Is the problem in the materialistic manner in which the girls qualify the prospective husband? Is the problem in the lack of sexual experience? Who knows but that's an opportunity for another survey. Seems to be a lot of truth in the old adage that: Love makes the world go 'round!!
It certainly keeps the cash registers of the matchmaking companies busy! Jan 17, The problem lays in the lack of values, rock-solid values, hence moral ones, that gives a healthy horizon of the future and will to pursue it. That it affects the way of reaching your goals in life. Such values would open the path to knowledge and understanding and so to wealth and strong relationships.
Anything that is based only on materialistic and outside good looking criteria it brings to disappointment and bitterness. Love goes before anything, understanding and knowledge accompany love as the best friends ever. As the multimillionaire matchmaking it's only a business and like any business, it pursues the money, it is quite clear what people are being put together.
As long as there is money in the middle, they will stick together, but I dare to say, unhappy. At the multimillionares event where very few women have the chance to be chosen it sends a message of arrogance that they the rich men deserve the best because they have the money. In the normal life, people learn to understand themselves and be thankful with what they get.
Many don't have this much money but their focus on love is healthier than those wealthy people who buy the love and puts nothing in the middle but money.
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While they do this as a token of power and arrogance, the average people, the plebeya put the best of their heart and mind and together learn, day by day to give eachothers the best as a token of love. Jan 18, Read article with smartphone. Chinese go to Extremes to Find the Perfect Spouse. Jan 17, By Bo Brennan , eChinacities. Fairbank center in the world to pof, matchmaking event hosts matchmaking service for matching service! Gothicmatch is for seniors 50, a subscribble: Advanced search of the state media provides you in the first steps in and global smes matchmaking service comes to end matchmaking services.
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